You feel sad, broken, and unable to find a way out of the darkness you may be feeling.
Maybe the onset was from stress, a loss of a job, or just a burnout from work piling up and life feeling all over the place. No matter what is making you feel broken, please know that you are not “odd” for feeling this way. You are allowed to feel broken and can take as long as you need to feel better. I have felt broken many times. Job after job firing me was stressful questioning myself “Why me?”.
In the meantime, how do you continue to move forward even when broken? We have bills, plans, and responsibilities to take care of which seems to be the hardest part of healing–because time moves forward. So, what can you do to succeed while broken? Here are a few suggestions to make the slow (but steady) climb back up the mountain feel a bit better.
Create small rewards for yourself
We always see those rewards on the internet for just getting out of bed, but sometimes, that is all we can do. Small rewards can go a long way in making yourself feel better and work towards bigger goals over time.
Perhaps, a goal is that after three hours of work you can get Starbucks. It seems silly, but sometimes we need a little push to get our work complete when we are not feeling our best. It may seem like a silly thing to reward yourself for something you need to do, but it shouldn’t be viewed as silly. You are feeling off and need an incentive and whether that incentive involves caffeine, a yoga class, or a glass of wine, go for it!
Take a step back from unnecessary “noise”
Noise can be dead-end friendships, family members who bring you down, clients that can weigh you down without much of a pay-off. Whoever is bringing you down and causing you to continuously feel bad about yourself and your worldview most likely is not worth having much contact with.
Sometimes, success means cutting ties or stepping away from things that do not bring you joy or build you up. This does not make you a failure that a friendship had to slip away, you had to get rid of a client, or distance yourself from toxic family, but instead, this is leading you to success because your focus can be towards the positives in your life as compared to the negatives.
Implement a good self-care system
Self-care can be the hardest care to attain. Sometimes, you may sit there and wonder “When did I shower last?” Nobody wants to not take care of themselves, but when you are feeling broken, it slips away from us. Eating during the day, exercising, and taking care of your mental health are all different ways of working towards your success. You cannot be successful if you are starving yourself inadvertently or working yourself to death–professionally and personally.
Take the time to make time for yourself. Set aside thirty minutes every few hours to make sure breakfast, lunch, and dinner all have your focus. Look up a fitness class you want to take and shut down from life for that time and focus on you. Make sure you are not working into the night and that you get enough “you” time to feel better.
Reach out and speak to someone
We never want to admit we are feeling broken because somehow we can correlate brokeness with failure. Luckily, no one is a failure for feeling broken as it is something we all feel at times. But, if you are feeling very broken and in need of help, please reach out.
Reaching out could mean professionally to a doctor or psychologist or just a mentor or close friend. Whoever you decide to speak to, make sure they have your best interest at heart. This does not mean someone who will tell you what you want to hear, but instead, someone who will listen and give you advice that is neither criticism or sugar-coated to what you want to hear. Success comes from honesty, so you need to be honest with yourself when you need help, and you need those you reach out to, to be honest with you as well.
Accept the journey for what it is–a journey.
Life is a journey, and sometimes journey’s hit snags. You may feel like you are plateauing, you may feel hopeless and broken, or you may feel like this bad time will never end. The good news is that one day, it will be over. That does not mean you won’t have new problems, but you will have succeeded while broken enough to learn how to properly deal with each situation as it is handed to you. You braved the storm, now enjoy the sunshine for a bit. Journey’s are never from point a to point b and also include stops at c,d,e, and so-on.
Success in living while broken is not a one-size fits all statement. Take each step of the journey at the pace you need, to continue to grow and move forward. At one point, you will be able to put your clothes on, feel confident, and greet the day with a smile, but until then, take the time needed to heal.
You are still killing it, girlfriend!
Ronne B
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