Self Care. It’s a word that has been thrown around a lot, but what does it actually mean? How does one go about taking care of “Self”?

I used to think self-care involved picking out a pretty nail color, talking to friends over brunch, and sitting in a sauna for a little while. Don’t get me wrong spa days, and cute mani’s are a form of self-care, but we often forget that external remedies aren’t effective if our insides are falling apart.

When the world speaks of self-care they are usually speaking about a girlfriends trip to Hawaii, or a workout session or two. However, what happens when you return home to the same mess and nothing to show for it but a tan, a cute Instagram selfie, and some stolen…ahem, borrowed, hotel soap?

We have to understand that short-term fixes are not a replacement for long-term solutions. Good news is that they can work hand in hand. Matter of fact, I believe it works best in tandem!

1. Short-term Self Care: Tend to Temple Duties

In times of stress the first thing we do is neglect our temples (bodies). You may do just enough to be presentable (like shave your legs to the knee), but the fact that 3 hours of sleep has become a triumph, says otherwise.

Take the time to do your nails, eat well, sleep well, work out (which may include a lap or two around Target—I won’t tell anybody) or find an awesome moisturizer for your skin.

These are what you call temple duties.They are necessary and dare I say mandatory.

2. Long-term Self Care: Look Deeper

Short term self care is like tending to a surface wound that is actually 3 layers deep. Your internal stress levels may subside briefly with some nail polish and a new hair cut, but ultimately that “high” will fade away within the hour. You have applied a band-aid on your pinky toe but the real issue is your heart.

We spend time nursing a situation that we believe can be fixed with a walk by the lake but may actually originate from a deep seeded animosity for your father, a childhood bully from the 3rd grade, or a dream that was sacrificed for the greater good.

There is only ONE person in the entire universe that knows what the real issue is and how to fix it. He wants us to bring the stresses of life to Him.

3. Make Room for Grace

As women of faith we can begin to believe the lie that self-care means you will never get angry at your children, you will always have the perfect amount of sleep, your stress level will always be at a minimum, your nails will never be chipped and those jeans from freshman year in college will automatically zip up every time you choose to wear them.

Self care, when done right, is a journey that is fueled by grace.

It’s knowing you serve a God who smiles at your sneak of cake you are currently eating in your closet because, kids.

It’s buying nail polish from CVS because there’s no time for a salon visit.

It’s running up and down the stairs because gym fees don’t grow on trees.

It’s listening to an e-devotional on the way to work because you overslept.

Self-care is our human attempt to find sanity in a crazy world.

Ronne B